#49: What is the Relationship Between Past Trauma and Current Betrayal Trauma?

"I understand that you started out working in psychiatry. In my family of origin we experienced several psychiatric traumas (brother diagnosed as schizophrenic, sister who experienced postpartum psychosis shortly after her husband passed away). I don’t think we really processed emotionally. I experienced what I would call depression and anxiety through my life, but was never diagnosed. I’ve always felt like there was something in my way or holding me back. Now, as I’ve been married for nearly 10 years and after 5 kids, last year I experienced a breakdown so confusing, painful and traumatic. The theme of it was my relationship with my husband around his use of pornography. (He was exposed as a child, and I don’t believe he’s truly entered real recovery) We both came into the marriage unhealthy or at least immature emotionally, from my perspective. I have gained information from him piecemeal and I have gained information about dealing with pornography slowly as well. These last few months were the first time I’d ever heard of betrayal trauma. It has been so helpful and validating for me, and I have a strong determination to seek healing for myself regardless of his choices. My question is regarding the connectedness of my earlier life traumas and my ability to trust myself with the realities surrounding the present one. I’m wondering what approach to finding truth and understanding is more helpful? Starting with the earlier life traumas to better understand the current situation, vice-versa, or a combination? Is there an approach to therapy that would be more helpful than others for those like me, with mental health/emotional/possibly hormonal challenges that have us believe that we are a bit crazy already? Or in your mind are these challenges just on a continuum and the solutions one and the same? I really enjoy the podcasts I’ve heard you on (I discovered the betrayed, the addicted and the expert first) and have started your boundary boot camp. Thank you for your work!"  We would love to have you as a guest on the podcast. Go to realtalkrecovery.com to submit your question and sign up! Join us at our 3 Day "Rising Son" Men's Conference, September 23-25 2021 in Logan, Utah. This conference is for men who are ready to step into higher-level recovery. Sign up on our website: https://risingsonconference.com Brannon Patrick | "The Expert": Follow Brannon on instagram @brannon_patrick. For more info, find him at brannonpatrick.com. Check out Brannon's Boundary Bootcamp on his website. Tyler Patrick | "The Wandering Therapist": Tyler is a co-founder Love Strong (lovestrong.com). Check out the Love Strong YouTube Channel for more therapy tips and skills and videos about WHOLEHEARTED living and Christian Based Recovery. Instagram: @love.strong.organization