Review: The Watchers

The Watchers is the directorial debut of Ishana Shyamalan, produced by her rather more famous father M. Night Shyamalan. In it, a young woman (Dakota Fanning) finds herself trapped in the Irish woods by a mysterious group.The Watchers is the directorial debut of Ishana Shyamalan, produced by her rather more famous father M. Night Shyamalan. In it, a young woman (Dakota Fanning) finds herself trapped in the Irish woods by a mysterious group.Watch the movie trailer here.The Watchers - aka The Watched in some markets - was originally a novel by Irish writer A M Shine, of whom I know very little except he lives in Galway and goes in for something called Literary Horror.Which is presumably why Ishana Shyamalan took an interest in his book.The question that became increasingly insistent as The Watchers got underway was "Would this film have seen the light if Ishana's dad had been somebody else?"Far be it from me to invoke the trendy insult "nepo baby", but I doubt it. M Night Shyamalan actually produced the film.We open on our heroine Mina, played by Dakota Fanning, who works at a Galway pet shop.Mina's given a parrot to take to Belfast. But before she goes, she puts on a wig and goes to a pub, looking for trouble.You're possibly thinking Promising Young Woman at this stage, sticking it to the patriarchy perhaps? But it doesn't seem to be that. It doesn't seem to be anything. It's certainly never referred to again.You're going to have to get used to this, by the way. Maybe Ishana Shyamalan had a whole pile of movie scenes in a bottom drawer and was determined to fit as many as possible into her first film.In case there isn't a second one, perhaps?Anyway, she's driving through a forest - not questioning why the highway from Galway to Belfast should suddenly turn into the back of beyond - when the car breaks down.She takes the parrot - remember the parrot? - and goes exploring.And who's this in front of her but a strange blonde Irish woman, summoning her to a door that leads to a mysterious room in the middle of a forest?All right, a mysterious Coop. So there's Mina and blonde Madeline, and also a couple of youngies - Ciara and Daniel - and they all seem to be on standby.Apparently they're on show in front of an invisible audience.Mina steps up in front of the mysterious Watchers, and then.... And then what, A M Shine and Ishana Shyamalan?We seem to be trapped in a strange, endless limbo for no apparent duration and to no apparent purpose…Go to this episode on rnz.co.nz for more details